Showing posts with label purpose. Show all posts
Showing posts with label purpose. Show all posts

Sunday, 18 October 2015

No Man Can Make You Happy



Have you been wondering Why your boyfriend doesn’t just get you? Have you been trying to figure out why your husband or boyfriend of several years can't make your happy? Well, the truth is: No man can make you happy. And I’m not sure God ever designed men to.
That’s because happiness is based on circumstances. Yet circumstances are the one part of our lives over which we have virtually no control. Since we can’t control circumstances, pursuing happiness means constantly scanning our surroundings to see if they make us happy. And as soon as we start doing that, we will find all the reasons why our circumstances don’t measure up.
God never intended us to be passive. He made us to actively engage this world and to shine in it. So perhaps we need another route to happiness in marriage or our relationships—one that is far more likely to get us to the finish line. And it starts with fixing our own hearts.

Pursue Joy

I think of happiness as quite distinct from joy or contentment. Joy looks upward, contentment looks inward, and happiness looks outward. Joy says, “How great is our God!” Contentment says, “It is well with my soul.” And happiness says, “All things wise and wonderful, the Lord God made them all.” But you can’t appreciate what’s outside of you until you’re at peace with what’s inside. And that requires focusing on God first.
Psalm 37:4 : “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart”. This doesn’t mean that when we delight ourselves in God he gives us everything we want; it means that when we delight ourselves in God, he actually changes what we want. We start looking with gratitude at what God has done for us.

Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness

Sometimes nothing changes except  we work on our attitude. We need to Run after God!
Women! jump on the Joy track and start looking for ways to bring God into your daily life. You can start to conversationally pray “without ceasing.” Turn to Scripture not to fix her problems but just to see Jesus.
We need to understand first of all that  Our happiness is a gift to the people we cherish...husband..kids... When we pursue joy and find happiness, we no longer rely on 'man" to make us happy. When we look to God first, we free our husbands or loved ones  to be who God made them to be, not who we want them to be. And that changes the whole dynamic in the relationship.

Deal with Sin

Jesus wants to bring wholeness to our lives, relationships and our marriages, and that wholeness can only come when we deal with our issues honestly.
Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9, NIV). We’re to make peace, not just keep peace. And in some marriages, too many keep peace. A lot of us (women) are so afraid of conflict that we try to keep issues from reaching the surface. peace we need to know isn't the absence of conflict (1 Corinthians 1:10). Real peace only comes when we stop hiding from reality and we bring our mess to God—even if that means rocking the boat.
Jesus gives us a different route to happiness.We are not to aim for happiness; but to aim for him instead. That’s not passively waiting for someone to make our life better; it’s actively pursuing God’s best for us, for our husbands, and for our marriage. Even if it’s hard.
Matthew 6:33 makes it clear enough that when we seek God first, every other thing will be added unto us. And so we need to keep running after Jesus because that’s the only way we can really experience any man's love.

cheers...

Monday, 17 August 2015

When Will It Be My Turn?

Let’s be honest, There are times when our lives seem to be at a stand still. We set goals, but it seems as though we will never achieve them. We sit back and watch everyone around us continue to be blessed and gloat about their answered prayers and continuous flow of blessings. We’re genuinely happy for them,  but we can’t help but wonder “when will it be my turn?” It’s not that we actually believe that God is ignoring us. We believe that He hears us and that He will answer us in due time. It’s the “due time” that gets us in a frenzy when God’s timing is taking too long.
“I’ve been patiently waiting for my Boaz for a while now. When will love finally find me? Lord, I need you to move now!”
“I’ve been trying to have kids for a while now. What if I’m too old to have kids? What if I’m too old to enjoy my kids?  I need God to bless me with a child before I’m 35. Lord, I need you to move now!”
“I’ve been trying to get my career off the ground for a while now. When will I get my big break? When will doors start to open for me? Lord, I need you to move now!”
These are all concerns that may interrupt our day to day living. We’re so focused on “when” we never stop to ask “what“.
What is it God wants me to learn during this waiting period?
What can I do to prepare myself while I wait?
What does the bible say about patiently waiting on God?
For me… I was praying for a husband. So much that my world started to revolve around finding him. This lead to a few unhealthy relationships which I knew were going nowhere from the start. I was so impatient and didn’t want to wait on God, so I was determined to try to force each and every one of them work. But how many of us know that when God says no, the answer is no? There’s no debating or negotiating. He has the final say so. It took me a while to get this in my spirit, but boy when I did!!! 
Instead of asking God why? I had to stop and ask myself a few questions. 
“What does God want me to work on within myself during this waiting period?”
“How can I draw closer to God instead of pulling away from Him during this waiting period?”
“Who can I encourage that may be going through the same thing?
God’s timing is perfect… never early, never late. He knows what is best for us and will place us at the right place at the right time. It’s only a matter of time, so hold on to Gods promises for your life.
Waiting may be painful at times, but It’s so necessary as Christians .  The fastest way is not always the best way!

Tuesday, 2 June 2015

Are You Marriage Material?


 So often in the pursuit of love we get so caught up trying to find the right person, that we end up losing ourselves.

But just as important as it is find someone who is marriage material, it’s important to take some time to look inward, making sure that we are meeting the very standards we are looking for in a partner.

So what does it take to become marriage material? Here are a few characteristics that we need to strive for as we seek to become all that God wants for us:

1. Faith: There is nothing more vital to the life-line of a healthy person than being rooted in relationship with Christ. Through this relationship, we learn what it means to really love, and are enabled to pour that same kind of love into our romantic relationships as well.  Don’t ever neglect your faith through the process of dating, because it’s the most important aspect to achieving a rich and meaningful love-life.

2. Self-Awareness: Self-awareness is such a crucial aspect to becoming marriage material. Knowing your strengths, your weakness, your struggles, your talents, and your flaws has everything to do with the health of your future relationship because healthy people attract healthy relationships. Become marriage material by taking the time to look inward. Deal with your baggage, and strive to become the best version of yourself.

3. Security: It is said that a person’s level of security and confidence is actually more attractive to the opposite sex than their actual physical appearance. A person of confidence knows that their value is not rooted in their relationship status, but rather, their identity in Christ. People of confidence are enabled to love out of their desire to give, rather than simply out of their desire to get.

4. Integrity: Honesty, Loyalty, Respect, Purity…living a life of integrity means that we resolve to develop the qualities of godliness in our lives. Integrity is something that begins long before we’ve entered a relationship, and has everything to do with how we act and interact with the people that God has placed in our lives here and now.

5. Responsibility: From how you deal with your finances, to how well you keep your word, and everything in between, being marriage material means that you take responsibility for your life. When you are responsible with your life, you will also be responsible with their heart.

6. Commitment: We live in a generation that’s absolutely afraid of commitment. From  choosing a career, to making plans for a Friday night, our culture tends to live paralyzed by fear rather than take steps of faith and move into action. Take a look at your life and ask yourself this: what has been your track record when it comes to the area of commitment? What fears, insecurities, and anxieties have been holding you back from living your life and making commitments? To become marriage material, it’s important to be a person that’s driven by faith, not by fear.

7. Significant Relationships: A person who is marriage material recognizes that there is so much value in relationships – above and beyond romantic ones. Healthy people have learned the art of making deep friendships, learning from wise mentors, and discipling those who are in need of direction. One way to know how someone will engage in a romantic relationship is by taking a look at how they interact with the people in their lives. Are your significant relationships marked by drama and conflict, or by communication and respect? Work on nourishing the relationships that God has given you here and now in order to prepare yourself for life-long love.

8. Maturity: To put it simply, to be marriage material – you need to grow up. And the thing about “growing up” is…it has nothing to do with your age. We live in a culture that allows us to remain children for far too long, never asking us to plan ahead or set goals; blaming everyone else instead of owning up to our life choices and responsibilities. But the quality of our life is determined by no one else and nothing less than the choices that we make day in and day out. Recognize your role in your life and in your relationships, by learning to grow up and take action.

9. Discipline: Believe it or not, all the things you struggle with as a single, you will likely continue to struggle with in your marriage. So there’s no better time to become marriage material than before marriage! God’s word reminds us that one of the fruits of the Spirit is self-control. What are the areas of your life that are in need of some self-control? Your spending habits? Your emotional world? Your sexual struggles? Your leisure activities? How are you spending the precious minutes of your life, and are you building habits that will benefit your future marriage, hang-ups that will poison it?

10. Communication: The truth is, marriage is a life-long conversation. But so many of us go into it without any knowledge of how to converse or manage conflict. We hold our feelings in, give the cold shoulder, or spew venomous words when we’re angry and upset. We don’t know how to recognize our feelings, much less share them with someone else. But to become marriage material, you need to learn how to communicate in a healthy way. What is your communication bent? Are you a passive, aggressive, or assertive communicator? Are you superficial in your conversation, or do you have the skills to go deep?

Having a healthy marriage starts long before the marriage begins. Take inventory of your life and ask yourself if you’re learning and growing in the ten areas mentioned above.

Do your future marriage a favor by using this precious time in your life to work on becoming the best version of yourself. Here’s to a healthy you, and in turn, to becoming “marriage material”.



Curled from truelovedates.com
 So often in the pursuit of love we get so caught up trying to find the right person, that we end up losing ourselves.

But just as important as it is find someone who is marriage material, it’s important to take some time to look inward, making sure that we are meeting the very standards we are looking for in a partner.

So what does it take to become marriage material? Here are a few characteristics that we need to strive for as we seek to become all that God wants for us:

1. Faith: There is nothing more vital to the life-line of a healthy person than being rooted in relationship with Christ. Through this relationship, we learn what it means to really love, and are enabled to pour that same kind of love into our romantic relationships as well.  Don’t ever neglect your faith through the process of dating, because it’s the most important aspect to achieving a rich and meaningful love-life.

2. Self-Awareness: Self-awareness is such a crucial aspect to becoming marriage material. Knowing your strengths, your weakness, your struggles, your talents, and your flaws has everything to do with the health of your future relationship because healthy people attract healthy relationships. Become marriage material by taking the time to look inward. Deal with your baggage, and strive to become the best version of yourself.

3. Security: It is said that a person’s level of security and confidence is actually more attractive to the opposite sex than their actual physical appearance. A person of confidence knows that their value is not rooted in their relationship status, but rather, their identity in Christ. People of confidence are enabled to love out of their desire to give, rather than simply out of their desire to get.

4. Integrity: Honesty, Loyalty, Respect, Purity…living a life of integrity means that we resolve to develop the qualities of godliness in our lives. Integrity is something that begins long before we’ve entered a relationship, and has everything to do with how we act and interact with the people that God has placed in our lives here and now.

5. Responsibility: From how you deal with your finances, to how well you keep your word, and everything in between, being marriage material means that you take responsibility for your life. When you are responsible with your life, you will also be responsible with their heart.

6. Commitment: We live in a generation that’s absolutely afraid of commitment. From  choosing a career, to making plans for a Friday night, our culture tends to live paralyzed by fear rather than take steps of faith and move into action. Take a look at your life and ask yourself this: what has been your track record when it comes to the area of commitment? What fears, insecurities, and anxieties have been holding you back from living your life and making commitments? To become marriage material, it’s important to be a person that’s driven by faith, not by fear.

7. Significant Relationships: A person who is marriage material recognizes that there is so much value in relationships – above and beyond romantic ones. Healthy people have learned the art of making deep friendships, learning from wise mentors, and discipling those who are in need of direction. One way to know how someone will engage in a romantic relationship is by taking a look at how they interact with the people in their lives. Are your significant relationships marked by drama and conflict, or by communication and respect? Work on nourishing the relationships that God has given you here and now in order to prepare yourself for life-long love.

8. Maturity: To put it simply, to be marriage material – you need to grow up. And the thing about “growing up” is…it has nothing to do with your age. We live in a culture that allows us to remain children for far too long, never asking us to plan ahead or set goals; blaming everyone else instead of owning up to our life choices and responsibilities. But the quality of our life is determined by no one else and nothing less than the choices that we make day in and day out. Recognize your role in your life and in your relationships, by learning to grow up and take action.

9. Discipline: Believe it or not, all the things you struggle with as a single, you will likely continue to struggle with in your marriage. So there’s no better time to become marriage material than before marriage! God’s word reminds us that one of the fruits of the Spirit is self-control. What are the areas of your life that are in need of some self-control? Your spending habits? Your emotional world? Your sexual struggles? Your leisure activities? How are you spending the precious minutes of your life, and are you building habits that will benefit your future marriage, hang-ups that will poison it?

10. Communication: The truth is, marriage is a life-long conversation. But so many of us go into it without any knowledge of how to converse or manage conflict. We hold our feelings in, give the cold shoulder, or spew venomous words when we’re angry and upset. We don’t know how to recognize our feelings, much less share them with someone else. But to become marriage material, you need to learn how to communicate in a healthy way. What is your communication bent? Are you a passive, aggressive, or assertive communicator? Are you superficial in your conversation, or do you have the skills to go deep?

Having a healthy marriage starts long before the marriage begins. Take inventory of your life and ask yourself if you’re learning and growing in the ten areas mentioned above.

Do your future marriage a favor by using this precious time in your life to work on becoming the best version of yourself. Here’s to a healthy you, and in turn, to becoming “marriage material”.o often in the pursuit of love we get so caught up trying to find the right person, that we end up losing ourselves.
But just as important as it is find someone who is marriage material, it’s important to take some time to look inward, making sure that we are meeting the very standards we are looking for in a partner.
- See more at: http://truelovedates.com/10-things-marriage-material/#sthash.1yBLkuIQ.dpuf