6 Rules of Handling Relationship Conflict..

Through conflict we can grow more like Jesus, see the world in a bigger way, and learn to be less selfish. We can feel understood and valued by our spouse. We can end up feeling that our marriage is rock solid.
But that doesn’t happen if conflict tears down rather than builds up.
So if you want it to build up, follow these 6 steps:

 

Now I know not all conflict can go that smoothly. Some of us struggle with spouses who are deep in sin or who are extremely selfish. But that is a minority of relationships. Usually it’s just a misunderstanding that’s making us feel off kilter.
To repair those moments, keep in mind these rules.


Curled from christianpost.com

 

I want to abstain from Sex but He doesn't

A lot of Christian women are deciding to abstain from sex until marriage for many reasons. The problem comes in when trying to date men who are accustomed to having sex while in a relationship.

I have decided to start dating again while i maintain living by God's principle to save sex for marriage but i keep meeting men who are Christians but don't want to live by God's principles about sex. I think it's more difficult knowing I'm not a virgin but i believe a man will wait for anything or anyone he feels is worth it. There is a shift happening now and because of the state of relationships people are becoming more thoughtful about their actions.
Never compromise your beliefs to please a man...actually it's more like Never compromise your relationship with God to please a man.The man who is for you will respect you and will wait for you.
I recommend doing it God's way. That's where the blessings are and less stress is there. Some women say they have sex because they want to. No, you're having sex because you've been conditioned and programmed to have sex to keep and to please a man. So you give a boyfriend the benefits of a husband and claim that it's all your idea.
If a man leaves you for having standards, let him leave. If a man can't see the bigger picture, he's still a grown boy and will probably cause you more pain and stress than peace and happiness.Has marriage worked even when the couple had sex while dating? Yes! Does that mean it's right? No! Sex keeps no man!!
I started talking to someone recently, he had some of the qualities of what i wanted in my man but he definitely can't wait or isn't willing to wait.
Build your relationship on friendship, not sex. If sex couldn't be part of your relationship, would it still work? If one of you had a stroke and couldn't have sex anymore, would there still be love? If one of you has a surgery or is hospitalized and you couldn't have sex, would there be infidelity? A lot of men even cheat on their woman while she's pregnant. That's because the relationship was built on lust and sex, not love and friendship. So my message to you is; if your legs are closed, keep them closed. If your legs are open, close them.
Do something out of the norm and build a relationship on friendship. Let the lust build and fulfill it when you give the woman a commitment until death do you part. Be the man and take the lead; and lead with love. Let it be your idea to wait until marriage for sex instead of being forced into it by her. You won't die without having sex. What you will gain is self-control, self-respect, focus, will-power, determination, strength, and so much more.

Challenge yourself and Grow through it because you're worth the wait.

Cheers...

Affair-guard your Marriage.

Marriage is very rarely a match made in heaven, and often requires much more work than many people realize they are getting themselves into. Along with the journey of parenting, marriage is truly one of the bigger challenges in our lives.
Affairs are, unfortunately, one of the biggest reasons for separation and divorce these days.That is why it is very important to understand what you can do today to help affair-guard your marriage in the years to come.
Communication is a key in any successful relationship. If you are having problems, turn towards your spouse, not away. You absolutely cannot fix a problem inside a relationship by turning outward. Your relationship must be based on a solid, underlying friendship. Friends talk, laugh, share, and do things they’re interested in together. Don’t stop being friends just because you’re married.
According to Lakesha of http://kingdomrelationships.org Growth is one vital element of marriage that many people take for granted. A constant sense of growth needs to be present in any marriage. If it’s not, one partner may feel like they are moving forward and their spouse is not, which often creates a wall between them. They feel as if they are worlds apart, or not on the same track as far as growth. Be sure to take time each day for growth within your relationship. Make a commitment to do one thing each day that will benefit your marriage, no matter how small it may be.  Make a plan together to renegotiate your relationship if you feel you’ve gotten off track.

Certain things in your marriage should be guarded like a hawk. There are things that should be held in high value in a marriage, and kept sacred.

• Time – The way you spend your time should be guarded in respect toward your marriage and family. Where are you spending your time? Ask your spouse if they need more time with you. Time with your spouse should be set aside and kept in high regards. Respect the time you spend together.

• Mind – What occupies your mind? Is your spouse often present in your mind? Do you think good thoughts about them? Evaluate what is on your mind, and put your marriage in there if it’s not already.

• Energy – Where you are putting your energy, especially everyday, is important to your marriage. Where are you putting your energy? Is your energy invested in your marriage, your family, or in less important events in life? Evaluate your energy, and make sure that there is a reasonable balance between activity, work, marriage, and family.

Finally, set a Formula for Success. Your marriage has to meet the needs of the two people involved. Understand what your spouse’s needs are so that you can meet them. Figure out what your own needs are and communicate them. If your needs are not being met, communicate and negotiate them. Don’t let resentment build.



Written by Lakesha..kingdomrelationships.org