This is one question that has ruined many relationships or that has kept so may Christians in their single state.
Recently, i asked my roomate how do we know the right one? Even though we couldn't figure out how, we agreed that God definitely would not come down to identify the one. I decided to find the answer to this question that has been bothering me and a lot of Christian singles.
Dating is tough enough for the world, but as Christ-followers, we often unintentionally put extra pressure on each other to get it “right”—and end up with unnecessary casualties of the heart.
Should pray about the people you consider dating? Absolutely.
When we’re seeking God for direction on a potential dating partner, it’s better to relax and get to know each other and have fun, rather than put that dangling noose in the air. Regardless of your intention, it comes off as a looming judgment. What if you interpret God telling you yes, but he interpretes no? Who is hearing God correctly?
Asking God if your date is the one has leads into the unhealthy mindset of believing there is one soul mate for everyone, and oops, sorry—you’re not it! At the end of the day, the only requirement God gives in His word is that you marry a fellow believer. Past that, it’s a matter of chemistry, compatibility and choice.
Too many times Christian men and women realize they aren’t interested in moving a relationship forward, and pass the buck on to God with statements like “I don’t believe this is God’s will” and “God told me to break up with you.” It’s a lot easier to put the blame on God than on ourselves when things just don’t work out. Gof gas given us free will and that person we’ve invested in deserves the truth (gently, and in love).
If or when you realize you don't want to pursue more with that person, give them the real reason—don’t pass the buck on to God. That’s damaging to them, and usually, it’s not even true.
Give solid reasons why and don't try to hide behind a spiritual curtain.
We might not want to hear this, but most of the time, it’s a simply a matter of not wanting to admit the harder-to-say truth of "you know what, you're cool, but I just don't feel any chemistry between us". Or "Hey, you're awesome but I'm not completely over my ex yet." Or "Hey, you're fun to be around, but I think I see you more like a friend or a sister."
As much as rejection from people can hurt, it hurts so much worse to think you're being rejected by God. Thinking you aren't good enough for this person or you're not qualified to be a substantial part of their life.
So quit asking God if he or she is “the one”.
And instead, start asking how you can be a good date. Ask how you can protect and build up the other person in the equation, whether they turn into a date or a spouse or a good friend. Ask how you can demonstrate Christ-like love and edify. Ask how you can draw them closer to Jesus through your words and actions. Ask for God to guard both of your hearts, and not stir up or awaken love until it’s time. (Song of Solomon 2:7)
And trust God to take it from there.
Soure: ibelieve.com
Quite insightful. Thank you
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