Have you been wondering Why your boyfriend doesn’t just get you? Have you been trying to figure out why your husband or boyfriend of several years can't make your happy? Well, the truth is: No man can make you happy. And I’m not sure God ever designed men to.
That’s because happiness is based on circumstances. Yet circumstances are the one part of our lives over which we have virtually no control. Since we can’t control circumstances, pursuing happiness means constantly scanning our surroundings to see if they make us happy. And as soon as we start doing that, we will find all the reasons why our circumstances don’t measure up.
God never intended us to be passive. He made us to actively engage this world and to shine in it. So perhaps we need another route to happiness in marriage or our relationships—one that is far more likely to get us to the finish line. And it starts with fixing our own hearts.
Pursue Joy
I think of happiness as quite distinct from joy or contentment. Joy looks upward, contentment looks inward, and happiness looks outward. Joy says, “How great is our God!” Contentment says, “It is well with my soul.” And happiness says, “All things wise and wonderful, the Lord God made them all.” But you can’t appreciate what’s outside of you until you’re at peace with what’s inside. And that requires focusing on God first.
Psalm 37:4 : “Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart”. This doesn’t mean that when we delight ourselves in God he gives us everything we want; it means that when we delight ourselves in God, he actually changes what we want. We start looking with gratitude at what God has done for us.
Take Responsibility for Your Own Happiness
Sometimes nothing changes except we work on our attitude. We need to Run after God!
Women! jump on the Joy track and start looking for ways to bring God into your daily life. You can start to conversationally pray “without ceasing.” Turn to Scripture not to fix her problems but just to see Jesus.
We need to understand first of all that Our happiness is a gift to the people we cherish...husband..kids... When we pursue joy and find happiness, we no longer rely on 'man" to make us happy. When we look to God first, we free our husbands or loved ones to be who God made them to be, not who we want them to be. And that changes the whole dynamic in the relationship.
Deal with Sin
Jesus wants to bring wholeness to our lives, relationships and our marriages, and that wholeness can only come when we deal with our issues honestly.
Jesus said, “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called children of God” (Matthew 5:9, NIV). We’re to make peace, not just keep peace. And in some marriages, too many keep peace. A lot of us (women) are so afraid of conflict that we try to keep issues from reaching the surface. peace we need to know isn't the absence of conflict (1 Corinthians 1:10). Real peace only comes when we stop hiding from reality and we bring our mess to God—even if that means rocking the boat.
Jesus gives us a different route to happiness.We are not to aim for happiness; but to aim for him instead. That’s not passively waiting for someone to make our life better; it’s actively pursuing God’s best for us, for our husbands, and for our marriage. Even if it’s hard.
Matthew 6:33 makes it clear enough that when we seek God first, every other thing will be added unto us. And so we need to keep running after Jesus because that’s the only way we can really experience any man's love.
cheers...
